MY STORY
Before I found myself immersed in understanding how to build healthy relationships, empower myself to become a better version of myself, and build a successful business I did not realize the power of the negative associations and people I allowed to come into my life, and I almost lost myself, my values, and the things I truly wanted in my life.
I held onto past heartbreak, and toxic relationships, and at this point, you could say I was faced with many hurdles along this journey, both physically and mentally. In twelfth grade, I decided to join the track team, so I could increase my stamina for dance. Little did I know that joining the track and field team and becoming a hurdler would change my life forever. It came with a few heartbreaks, recognizing that you can’t trust everyone whom you think is your friend, and it also came with many personal successes.
During my time in community college, I broke the school record in the 400-meter hurdles, broke the school record in the 100-meter hurdles, was a state finalist, earned All-American status, was named Most Valuable Player and had the fourth-fastest time in the nation in the 400-meter hurdles. After doing some research and trying my best to advocate for myself to transfer to a school and run track I was offered a $15,000 athletic scholarship to compete as a Division I track and field athlete. At this point I had only been running track for two years, so this came as a surprise to me. On top of this, I was blessed enough to win a $20,000 academic scholarship which would later allow me to transfer to a 4-year college.
Even though I had these accolades and successes on the track, my current relationship was trash, and I knew I deserved better. I also struggled with my confidence on the track, and I let fear run every race for me, but that all changed the very last race of my track career. That day I asked myself what do I have to lose? At the NCAA Regional Championships, I ran faster than I ever did in my whole life. I was in first place and living my best life (let’s go). THEN……. the last 100 meters of the race I caught a cramp, and it all went downhill from there. About five girls passed me in the last 100 meters of the race, and I didn’t make it to the finals ☹, BUT the point is I HAD CONFIDENCE in my abilities, and I BELIEVED in myself. That was my fastest race ever and I beat my own personal record. That day I learned how powerful the mind is and that I can master my mindset and improve my skills if I truly wanted to.
Upon graduating with my bachelor’s degree in Psychology and a minor in Human Sexuality I realized I desired to do more with myself, so I went back to school to earn my Master of Science in Counseling with a specialization in Marriage and Family Therapy. In working with several clients as a Marriage and Family Therapist I helped them navigate the challenges of having healthy and happy relationships with themselves and others, learn how to improve their lives and let go of past pain, and growing in a more positive way and accomplish their dreams.
During this same time, I met a guy who would later become my husband to my surprise. Honestly, due to all the challenges we had while being in a relationship it felt like a struggle because we both have dominant personalities, and his children were trying to adapt to me, and it appeared they may have been trying to get rid of me as well! I was tested beyond my patience with him and the kids. We finally broke up and I was not sure where life would take me, BUT I was 1 million percent confident we would not be together because our relationship was toxic, and I was over him. I even made an April Fool’s joke with my best friend that he asked me to marry him, and I said yes. I even had a fake ring and everything…all while I was thinking that this is the funniest joke ever and that this will never happen because I was done with him.
A few months later we started talking again and he proposed to me later that year. The five-karat ring he got me was so nice, I said yes to his proposal, not sure how things would go in our relationship because we still had challenges and things to figure out.
Occasionally, I had thoughts of “should we get married” because at times it seems like the grass was greener on the other side and I could possibly be happier, and things could be easier in a different relationship or if I was just single and alone by myself. We had been together for five years at this point and I was still angry with resentment, frustrated with the kids, and not sure if this was the life I wanted to continue to live because I could not see it getting any better. I am happy to say that we got married and we became stronger than ever as a family and I have one of the best husbands ever. What helped the relationship was that I went through a process of change and got to know what I needed and what I could do to get what I wanted and needed from my husband. I created a system and a winning formula that allowed me to create a happier and more fulfilling marriage and a wonderful relationship with the kids, seeing as I was only their bonus mom as some would say.
At this point in my life, I am happily married and see how powerful love is. I live in my purpose and understand the value of relationships. I now inspire and motivate other women as a Relationship and Empowerment Coach, where I help high-achieving women become empowered to take action to live better in their lives, love more in their relationships, and thrive in their purpose. I have had the honor of coaching my clients to understand their purpose, become aware of self-limiting beliefs, understand their fears, and grow beyond what they believed was possible.